COMING OUT.

 I was standing in the checkout queue at Checkers, when I overheard the conversation of the two middle aged men in front of me. I didn't hear everything but what I did hear was interesting. The one man was saying his kid came home with a form that needed to be filled in asking whether their child was gay, lesbian, transexual or LGBTQ. Well this is the first time I've heard of this. By the tone of the man's voice, he didn't sound to happy about it. I must admit it is not a subject matter that is discussed openly in most families. Let me try and help you all. Firstly will a teenager easily tell his parents they are gay? I think it is one of the hardest things to do especially if the parents are old school. I can honestly say I never told my parents although my late mother did suspect something. All she said was "I still love you, no matter what". That was a surprise to me. My late father never asked but didn't say anything either. So to me the case was closed. But is it as easy as that? Some parents will disown their children and will kick them out of the house. Why would a parent do that? I've never been a parent but I would never do that to someone who is different to me? Imagine gay parents doing that and disowning their straight children. Doesn't make sense does it? 

BEING GENDERFLUID, WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

 I'm not entirely sure how to approach this subject matter, but one thing I know for sure is that I feel I am on the right track. Here is what I already know: "Someone who is fluid -- also called gender fluid -- is a person whose gender identity (the gender they identify with most) is not fixed. It can change over time or from day-to-day. Fluid is a form of gender identity or gender expression, rather than a sexual orientation."

 At the moment I am trying to get my hair to grow out healthily. That could take a while considering my hair is thinning on top. But help is at hand, I have started using ViGro shampoo for thinning hair. My hairdresser says it is very good shampoo, so let's see how this goes. Since starting to use it, 3 weeks down the line I can see results especially on top above my scalp. They say it should take 12 weeks to really see the results. My hair does look thicker than 2 years ago, so I definitely am doing something right! Hair should be washed every 2 to 3 days with the shampoo. Let's see the results at the end of the month.

I need to start being more feminine as I tend to still wonder what people are going to say with a transition of any sorts! Then again I shouldn't be worrying at all, as I have come this far and there is no going back! Looking for hoop earrings that are a bit heavier than what I found at MrP the other day. I need feminine or unisex tops that I can wear so I still have a lot to do.

I will update my progress as often as I can, hoping you will all understand.

I HAVE AN OBSESSION!

 I've said it before and I'll say it again! "I have an obsession with growing my fingernails long!" It's nothing new, as I have been doing it for the past 20 years or so. When I was younger it was taboo for a male to have long fingernails. Well here we are and things have changed. Male make-up artists are wearing make-up and have long painted nails. In my younger days you couldn't express yourself how you wanted! Pink was for girls and blue was for boys.

I am in the process of putting together a short video, showing clips of all color polishes and nail art that I have used over the years. So watch this space. It will be available on YouTube as well.   I need to start doing make-up seriously too as it gives me something new to do. Hopefully 2022 will be the year for me, as I'm starting to write more blog posts. I was neglecting my writing in the past and I used to be so good at it. I can do without a lot of things in life. Manicures, long nails and being feminine are not on that list!

A NEW BEGINNING?

It's time for a change and I need to show my real identity by making drastic changes to my life. No more being afraid what the next person will say or think about me. I have been slowlwly getting them used to my everyday look and it is working. Whilst I was in hospital recently, I walked around the ward with my pink toe nails and no one seemed to bother, not even the nurses or doctors. Lol. Whether the patients in the ward were too sick to notice, I wouldn't know. In 2004/2005 I had my ears pierced and for a while I wore earrings which were not unusually large but noticeable, until I lost one of them. Recently I decided to look for earrings again, as I was told to keep the piercings open, one should wear earrings more often. The only ones I could get that were a bit bigger than the ones I had. Yes hoop earrings so what? I don't care what you think, besides I'm not trying to look masculine or feminine for that matter. For those who want to know where I got them from: they are available at MrPrice for R20! Lol. I am told the Gateway branch has a much larger selection. So let's try these out, and get used to them. I really don't know why jewellery and clothing is catagorized into male and female? If want to wear hoop earrings, I will. For 17 years I have been doing accryllic nail tips, so what else is new? I pierced my ears way back in 2004, so this is not a new thing. It's progress!

I'M BACK AND STILL ALIVE!

It's been awhile since I wrote anything on this blog. I know a lot of you probably think I met my maker or worse yet, sucummbed to Covid19. Well I'm happy to say none of that has happened and I am alive. I'm hoping to change the blog layout and design too, so any suggestioms would be welome. I need to start watching YouTube makeup videos too. What with this excessive locckdown we have been having and not being able to buy products. For six months we were banned from getting our nails done too! Can you believe that? Hair salons were not allowed to operate as well, something to do with social distancing. But here we are in August 2021, being forced to wear masks and life carries on. At least I can now dye my hair pink and get my nails done.

Welll this won't be the last post from me, I just wanted to tell you I'm still around and there is more to come!

DISCOVERING MYSELF 3

I'm on a mission. Before I can consider how I will live my life there are two things I have to  tackle first, one is to lose weight and secondly I must try and eliminate my gout. It's because of the gout that my feet are slightly swollen which prevents me from wearing my high heels and "other" shoes. So I have to start getting a diet together.
In my search for an identity, I will be venturing into uncharted territory as I would like to put it. On the 19th December I'm going to have some nail art done on my long nails. I know more or less what I want done so I will post the result here afterwards. I have developed a sudden intrest in nailart. Maybe this the next step towards my adrogony? The picture below is not of my nails but one I found on the web. I love the design and would like to have it done for pride next year. What do you think? Meantime I was thinking of using red instead of gold with silver stripes.

Actually the more I look at this pic, the more I like the colour and design. Maybe I'll even end up doing this on my next appointment at Woman's World. It's been decided, I'm doing my nails like the ones above. I'm so excited I can't wait! I spoke to my nail tech and it's going down on the 19th. This design is stunning and definitely something I would do!

Here's another photo by the same nail artist as above. I just love the color. Even though the photo is called "Halloween Nails" I just love it! Halloween may be over but one could do other designs on them.That color is something else. I know I've written more about my nails this time, but.I believe it is all part of my identity. You can take it or leave it coz I'm gay and I'm here to stay! 

DISCOVERING MYSELF Part 2

After the last post, and discussions with a few friends, I have decided for the time being just to be who I am and not to be who others want me to be. Why should I waste time and energy worrying what other people think of my femininity? I don't plan going anywhere or changing for those people. I am gay and I'm here to stay, so get over it. One of the first things I need to do is alter my dress code to something more unisex, as the trousers I wear don't fit my personae. I think it's the cut of the trousers, but first I have to lose a few kilos here and there before I embark on that journey. Nothing is impossible! My diet should probably change too as I suffer from gout and with my colon cancer the surgeon recently removed 75% of my colon. I'm still functioning as a normal human being, I need to get my health in order too.
My feet are a bit of mess too, all to to do with the effects of gout. My hair has always been long, but when I do drag I prefer using wigs. I always say "blondes have more fun", hehe. Below I attempted to wash a synthetic wig and for a first try it turned out fine.

One of my friends who is a hairdresser, is going to make me a new wig. Can't wait for that to happen. With me still going for my regular manicures and pedicures, I feel liberated. It is hard to believe that I have been going for manicures for over 12 years! Hopefully for 2017 I can look forward to new challenges. I really need to practice make-up. As they say practice makes perfect. Getting the right cosmetics is another ball game, luckily I know a few people who can give advice. Fortunately Youtube is overflowing with make-up tutorials for every occasion. I'll leave you with a latest picture of my nails....